Lost sight of me....

Lost sight of me.... blog

...yep, so as you read yesterday, I figured since I cant' do all the things I want to do, to just give up, forget anything about being healthy, just eat, get fat and lazy because, well, you might as well. Well, duh, that isnt' me. And maybe that was getting me down, but that is silly. I am a person who cares about how I feel and look. I am a person who likes to eat healthy and enjoys a non-healthy treat every now and then. So, that doesn't mean that now i should just give all that up. For some reason, I always eat better when I am working out, and I wansn't working out, so I wasn't eating right. ACK! Not good.

But the truth is, I am still me, I just have to change a few things. I can still eat healthy, it might be harder, but I can still do it, and I can succeed at it. I mean, I used to love that, eating right, meeting my protein goal, etc., but for some reason, I got lazy with it. So, that has to change - I need to eat right again, and just thinking about it makes me feel back on track to finding myself. I don't need to give up who I am completely. It often cracks me up when I look back on how extreme my feelings can be. I mean, the lowest of lows tend to end up making me laugh, I did that the other night. After a mean spell of crying, I just started to laugh.

And today, I realized it was all right to not be OK. It's all right to have symptoms that are not morning sickness and talk about them. It is all right to tell people that maybe I feel crappy because I can't windsurf next week. It is all right to be me. Ahh, that feels good to say...it's all right to be me. And the more I am more, the less worried I am about other people. So, from now on, no more hiding my feelings and thoughts and who I am. If people in my life have accepted me for who I am, then they should accept all of me, and if they can't, that's not my problem. It is all right to be me. That really just makes me smile. I think I felt I wanted to portray this awesome chick who isn't fazed by being pregnant and that is just silly. It affects everyone different and yes, I didn't get sick, I didn't get this or that, but I felt other things and i should talk about them. And I don't have to hide them.

So, thanks everyone on here for telling me I am not alone and reminding me that it is all right to be me and to be open and honest about who I am...and to remember, it is all right to be me!
6.11.2012

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