| So much change so soon blog |
It dawned on me today that I'll be considered full term (37 weeks) in fewer than 9 weeks. Of course, that means I probably have another good 13 weeks of being pregnant, but wowza! A single digit countdown is something to think about!
In some ways, it's still hard for me to wrap my head around the idea that this pregnancy is real. With all the earlier complications happening just when I would have normally allowed myself to start getting excited, I instead had to come to terms with the idea that I might lose this pregnancy (for a second time at that!). Feeling kicks while bleeding endlessly doesn't leave room for a lot of happy fantasies. I don't know that I've been fully able to remove myself from that protective mindset, and even though I am happy and excited, in some ways I'm still preparing myself for the worst. Not to say my thoughts dwell there, but it's always in the back of my mind.
This kid already feels different from Henry, and that's what I find myself thinking about the most. How interesting it will be to love two different children. I know they'll both make me proud.
8.9.2011
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