|A heart beat AND a change of dates--oh MY! blog
After our second appoint with my GP on the 16th and again, no heart beat it was really hard to stay calm and not worry.
Things have been anything but calm and nurturing in our environment lately-- for one, we have no HOME. We have a room, which is awesome and so much more than we could hope for. But it gets hard all the time, wanting to start setting up for our new family and not being able to.
And the health concerns. Since I'm post cancer, there's always that fear. What if I CAN'T carry to term? What if I'm not pregnant and its actually just more tumours in my uterus?
The list goes on.
Needless to say, when we were preparing for the ultrasound yesterday the hormones came out and unleashed on my poor guy.
To be fair he doesn't always handle my hormonal breaking points well-- he comes across as being argumentative and that just sets them OFF. Sometimes I feel like Jekyll and Hyde.
ANYHOW back to the entry....After lots of screaming and crying, he convinced me to go pick up my NEW req forms to presumably RE-DO my UMA/ pee test.. fuelling the idea in MY head that I was not ,in fact, pregnant-- he just had to bend and get me the home tests.
We went to pick up the forms and they weren't for the same test at all -- AND the box for pregnant under the clinical history was not checked. I was having a total meltdown as we headed back into the city towards our home base. It was silly, but I can't say I'd react any differently the second time around. Its unnerving when they can't find the fetal heart beat TWICe, when they assume at that point that you are about 14 weeks along.
I took both tests and got two lines each time (cue smug boyfriend face), but wanted to see the ultrasound (DREADING it actually)
The ultrasound went really well-- we got to see the baby AND the heart beat (sigh of relief here!) BUT we are BACK to 8 1/2 weeks!
So 170 BPM and healthy for being flung back into the first trimester, fair enough trade I think haha
Running as always though, Christmas is nearly here. Happy Holidays and congrats everyone!!