School will be starting in a week and a 1/2 for us. My youngest will be in 1/2 day kindergarten and my oldest is in 2nd grade already. Part of me is excited because I'll have the mornings to get more done for baby boy's arrival. But part of me is sad because my babies will both be gone. Both of my girls have attended a pre school program since they were 2 so I have been without them but this time it's just different. Truthfully, I don't like being alone as much as I used to. When I'm alone, I tend to get sad and think about all of the what if's that could be coming our way with this new baby. It scares me! November is just around the corner. This pregnancy has flown by and unfortunately, I've spent most of it worried. I think it seems to get a little easier with each passing day and the more I pray but that fear is still there. We still haven't told many people. Me, a few friends and my husband has told a few as well. We haven't shared anything with family yet, including our two girls. I'm not sure when the right time will be. I know everyone will have so many questions. I just don't know if I am ready to deal with that. Taking it day by day right now....
8.8.2012
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Nothing terribly exciting to report. I had my 24 week appt. yesterday but I didn't get to meet with my doctor. I met with the Nurse Practitioner. She said I am measuring 25 weeks. Not sure if that means baby may come early or that baby is big. They told me last week at my ultrasound that he was about 1 pound 4 ounces. Seems pretty average for this stage. I'll ask my doctor at my next appt. Another 4 weeks away. They seem like they are much closer together then that. This time is flying. Which is a good thing because this Summer is so hot. My feet and ankles are swollen already. Ugh! Still have a lot to do around here too but we ran out of money. Have to get my girls' room finished and start on the nursery. A little over 3 months to go!
7.24.2012
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My husband and I had a good conversation last night while painting the girls room (we are in the process of redoing their room as well as the nursery - so lot's going on here). We talked about how God chose us to be the parents of this little boy. How rewarding is that? Funny, but my doctor said the same thing to be awhile back when we were discussing the possibility that our baby boy could have DS. All of the signs have been there for awhile. Even before we had the definite diagnosis, there were so many signs around me. Is this God's way of preparing me for what's to come? Is this his way for me to get my emotions out now so that when he does arrive I can be a good mother to this child and not dwell in my misery? I think yes to all of these! I'm afraid, definitely but I think that the further along we get in this journey the better I will feel. I'm already closer and closer to acceptance and not denying the truth anymore. My Lord knows what I can handle and I have put my trust in Him. He will guide us through this journey. It's not going to be easy and there are so many unknowns right now and so many questions pop into my head every day. But He will be there with us through it all. That's reassuring. I've been finding hope and strength in the word and in worship music lately. Once again, another sign from above. Thank you Jesus for helping me through this. I'm hoping each day gets easier as I get closer to delivery day in November!
7.12.2012
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"also check out http://noahsdad.com/ He will be a belssing lady! Best wishes!" -- HC2007
"Thank you ladies. I can't tell you how much your prayers and support mean to me right now. We haven't told a lot of people yet. We've only said we're undergoing more testing to determine if he has DS but haven't told anyone the answer is yes yet. I haven't even told my family at all. I just don't want people to worry about us or try to "fix" our situation. It is what it is and I'm trusting in God for my guidance. So being able to release my feelings here where people don't judge has been ..." -- STACEYSKI
"Have you read Kelle Hampton's blog? Or her book, "Bloom?" I HIGHLY recommend her! Her journey is amazing as she tells you about having her 2nd baby with DS (but they didn't know--it was a complete surprise). You can read her blog here: http://www.kellehampton.com/ But, READ BLOOM! It is amazing!" -- BECKSMARIEDN
"How awesome for you. Every child is a gift from God, no matter what trials we have to deal with along the way. Keep your faith, you WILL succeed with this. It's okay to cry along the way, you are human after all, but rely on Him as the source of your strength, and you will get through this. I've prayed and prayed for you and your husband and it just makes me tear up to read this. ~Hugs~ Lisa" -- JACOBSMOM09
I have officially reached the 21 week mark. This past week was amazing - baby boy has become so much more active. He's literally bouncing around in there. I have also felt some pretty huge kicks or pokes this week. Most of the time they've stopped me in my tracks they were so strong. It's nice to feel all of this action and I try to stop and place my hand on my belly when I do feel him. It's so reassuring to me. Although the fear of the unknown is still there, I still haven't gotten my last blood work tests results. I am even afraid to pick up the phone at this time and am contemplating calling my doctor and having him release the results to my husband instead of me. I just don't need the stress of receiving a "bad phone call" when my husband isn't here to support me. Just waiting.... but enjoying these precious moments of baby boy dancing in my belly for now!
7.2.2012
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I have been able to feel this little guy moving inside me for quite some time. And the ultrasounds have proved how active he really is. :) Yesterday for the first time everyone was able to feel him on the outside! When I first felt him, I immediately stopped what I was doing and ran to my husband. He felt him right away, then my 7 year old did as well. My 5 year old wouldn't stand still long enough to feel him but she tried. LOL. How exciting! I've reached the 20 week mark today! 4 more months to go!
6.24.2012
I have my genetic ultrasound tomorrow. I'm 19 weeks now.... pregnancy has been wonderful so far. No major problems but definitely different from my other two. I'm insisting it's a boy because of that factor. :) We'll find out tomorrow. Praying that this baby is growing strong and healthy and no issues. We have no history in our families (mine or my husbands) of genetic problems. Other then the fact I was born with a hole in my heart. But I've been told that's not genetic. Praying for wonderful news and can't wait to see if it's a boy or a girl! Prayers appreciated tomorrow please.
6.20.2012
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"Unfortunately, it didn't go as well as planned. Although we got the great news we're having a boy, we also got some sad news as well. They found calcium deposits on my baby's liver and his nuchal fold and nose measured small. My chances of my baby having DS have increased to 1/5 now! We had to do some more blood work where they can separate the baby's blood from my blood and get some more answers. It could take 2 weeks for the results. I've been a mess! I can't sleep very well and I keep ..." -- STACEYSKI
"I didn't get to read this until today. Praying that all went well for you at your check. I had mine a week and a half ago." -- JACOBSMOM09
Ever feel like you're receiving signs from up above? So I've been worried for awhile now about my chances of having a baby with down syndrome. I'm at 1 out of 79 at this point. Well, lately, I've been seeing signs around that keep bringing this issue up for me. Special videos of precious babies with disabilities. Pictures. I've even seen children out and about in my daily life. It's like He is putting these things there to let me know that's it's ok. I don't know, maybe I'm just being silly but is He preparing me for what may come? I know Jesus doesn't want me to be sad and I also know that He won't give me anything I can't handle. Should I be prepping for this? Should I just move forward with my pregnancy like I never received this news? I guess I am typing all of this just to help get it out. I can't help but think that these things were put out there for me to see for a reason. I just saw a precious video on Facebook this morning of a little girl who was obviously disabled, and the video was promoting to not use the "r" word. I am not going to repeat it here. I also hate that word! This just stirred all of this up in my again this morning. All I can do is hold strong to my Faith and keep praying that my baby will be healthy no matter the outcome.
6.9.2012
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"I feel for your fear. I had a child 4 years ago who had a surprise diagnosis of DS (tests beforehand showed little "risk").
For me, I discovered that having a child like Brianna was an amazing and wonderful blessing that changed my life for the positive in ways I couldn't even imagine. And i discovered that a vast majority of parents react the same way.
The first months were a tough adjustment, and there are some health issues (including open heart surgery) that we needed to go thru. B..." -- BRAD123456
"http://odb.org/2012/06/11/a-circle -of-friends/
Stacey - I ready your blog last night, and have read your posts about your test results and your fears and concerns. I have prayed for you that God will calm you and give you exactly what you need (HIM) to get through whatever happens. Anyhow, I was reading one of my devotionals this morning and just wanted to share the link, because it was about special needs children. I too think about this, due to my age. I have spoken to so many people wh..." -- JACOBSMOM09
I am so excited that I found a Belly Band at Target yesterday. I saw them online and have been searching for one. It goes over your pants so that you can extend the wear of your regular clothes. AKA, you don't have to button those tight jeans. I haven't tried it out yet but plan on doing so today. I thought I was going to have to buy a whole new waredrobe of clothes but this will allow me to wear my current ones a little longer. I only have two pairs of maternity shorts so I wasn't sure how I was going to make it through this Summer. LOL. You can only wear dresses to so many places. I have a bunch of those that will help me get through the Summer as well. I'm so excited - had to share this. Anyone else looking for one of these - check the maternity clothes section at Target. Mine was $17 - so worth it!!!!!
6.2.2012
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"yeah, can you explain how it works? I am just almost 9 weeks and started looking at this stuff, but I don't get it? This will be my first baby and I am a little clueless on some things." -- HEATHERHUSKER2
"So far so good. Was able to wear my regular shorts this weekend without buttoning them. I might have to go and get a black one as well. I bought a nude color one." -- STACEYSKI
"I used one for a long time with my first pregnancy - they work great. I never had any issues at all, and work a lot of my regular stuff for several months. I got a black one and a nude colored one, because it really depends on your clothes and shirts what you want to wear. This time however, I think I only wore it once. Popped right out and can't fit into my regular clothes." -- JACOBSMOM09
"I really want one! But im curious to how well it holds your pants in place? Let me know how it works for you!" -- OCS246
Yippie! I hit the 14 week mark on Mother's Day! So excited to see my belly grow and to see how my other two girls are getting excited too. We pray every day for this baby growing inside of me and I love hearing them talk about things we need to buy for him/her. It's so cute! I know we all can't wait to meet him/her.
5.14.2012
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I received some heartbreaking news from my Doctor yesterday. He said that my chances of having a baby with Down Syndrome were 1/79. My risks were higher due to my age, I started at 1/120 anyway. I know it's just a 1% chance still but for some reason those numbers don't matter, just the words. I spent the day crying and praying and researching the internet. I read some wonderful words from women who have dealt with the same test results. Some were even slimmer chances. It almost made me feel guilty for feeling the way I feel. My husband and I know no matter what, this is our baby and we will not abort. We have also chosen to not do an amnio. At this point we have to wait until I am 16 weeks and do a more in depth ultrasound. I am currently 13 weeks. I am hoping that I will get over this fear and guilt and just enjoy the rest of my pregnancy. I have a little miracle growing inside of me and just want to enjoy this precious time. I pray that that comfort will come. At this point it has not. If you are reading this, please pray for me to find peace with whatever the outcome is. Thank you.
5.9.2012
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"Thank you! I think each day since has gotten easier for me and I am realizing more and more that #1 I am not in control (God is) and #2 the odds are pretty low. It's a little reassuring. I don't want to spend the rest of my wonderful pregnancy stressing over what may happen. I'm trying to just focus on a healthy baby and taking care of my two precious girls I have now. Keep the comments coming though, I enjoy reading them and they do help me get through the day! Hugs to all of you out ther..." -- STACEYSKI
"I will pray for you :) Keep in mind your odds are very slim. My doctor said usually because of age they flag those tests and it doesn't necessarily mean the baby will have it. I have a 1 in 14 chance my baby is a T18...related to Downs, but much worse. Don't stress yourself out. I'm sure it will work out fine :)" -- JANNETTE1973
"You are an incredible mother and the love you have for the little one can only help you. I know it is hard, but you can do this. Keep us posted as you get more information." -- SAMANTHABABYFIT
"Best wishes lady! Please keep us posted!!" -- HC2007
"Thank you for the blog information. I will definitely take a look at it. I've actually been trying to stay away from the internet today for the most part. I spent so much time yesterday researching and reading and quite frankly, it just made things worse. I'm feeling a little better today having gotten together with a friend and we prayed and cried together. I know it's not the end of the world but I am hoping I am ready for the journey I could be going on. I know God will never give me an..." -- STACEYSKI
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I have been able to feel this little guy moving inside me for quite some time. And the ultrasounds have proved how active he really is. :) Yesterday for the first time everyone was able to feel him on the outside! When I first felt him, I immediately stopped what I was doing and ran to my husband. He felt him right away, then my 7 year old did as well. My 5 year old wouldn't stand still long enough to feel him but she tried. LOL. How exciting! I've reached the 20 week mark today! 4 more months to go!
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