Well I got a prescription for clomid and I'm waiting for an SHG to tell me more about the potential polyp I have that needs to be removed (I'm experiencing two week periods and dr doesn't think I'm ovulating on my own). DH has low morphology (3% and should be 5%) and dr thinks that we wont be able to get pregnant with just clomid without IUI. DH is ok with trying clomid but doesn't want to try IUI until we have tried on our own with clomid.
Has anyone has issues with polyps and DH with low morphology and gotten pregnant with just clomid without IUI?
9.26.2012
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Well, I have a Dr. appointment with my fertility specialist on Sept. 26 and then I have to schedule an SHG before I can even get on the waiting list for my polyp removal procedure. I'm just so tired of waiting to be pregnant. 8 months of TTC have gone by and I just want to be pregnant. I hope that I can at least get my prescription for clomid when I see my doctor so that I don't have to wait yet again for another follow-up appointment after my SHG and polyp removal. I have heard it can take a while to get an appointment to get polyps removed. And I'm not looking forward to more waiting. I just hope that once I get the polyps removed and I start clomid that I don't have to wait too long to get pregnant. I feel like its already been an eternity and its really wearing my down and making me super depressed!
9.13.2012
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"Well I got my SHG scheduled for the 25 and I have my appointment at the fertility clinic on 26. Hopefully I will be able to get my clomid and schedule my polyp removal on the 26th. I'm still trying to stay positive that I will be able to TTC before Christmas. But most of me is thinking that I will have to wait until afterwards." -- AMANDA_JK
Well I just got an HSG done this morning. It was very uncomfortable and the pressure made me cry during the procedure. My period hadn't fully stopped so I was very nervous that they weren't even going to do the procedure and I would have to come back. Since my periods are anywhere from 5 to 15 days its really hard to schedule an HSG for after your period and before you ovulate.
Anyways, they were able to see that I have a uterine polyp. I know I should be received to know why my periods suck and why I spot all the time and why I'm not pregnant after 8 months of trying. Buy when I left the exam room I just started bawling. I'm so tired and frustrated about all the waiting and problems. It will take another 6 weeks or so to get an appointment to remove the polyp and I don't have a follow-up appointment with my fertility doctor until September 26. There are so many people who get pregnant so easily and without even trying and I just feel like I have been dealt a shitty hand and all I want is a baby. I was hoping that I would not have anything wrong and that the fluid from the HSG would clear my tubes and I would finally get pregnant this month. But now I will have to wait at last another 1 to 2 cycles to get pregnant. I know that there are others in worse situations than me but I just can't help feeling so frustrated and sad about my whole journey so far.
8.24.2012
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"I know you feel terrible..but here's part of my story. I'm 38yo had been ttc for 5+ yrs, MRI reveal complete septate uterus, had to have 3 hysteroscopy metroplasy/ laparoscopy, and in between my surgerys as soon as i was done RE would tell me, "ok let's see what the hsg reveals on septum and will be ready to move on with fertility treatments" I was so happy after each visit, just to get chattered after hsg results :( months and months went buy..started seeing my RE 8/15/11 and by May 21./12 I ..." -- SARALEJO2011
I finally got to see a fertility specialist and I'm scheduled to have an HSG to see if I have any blockages in my tubes, check out my ovaries and flush out any mucus build up. I need this test before my doctor will give me clomid to help stop the spotting and help me get pregnant. You have to have the test 6-10 days after your cycle starts and I'm worried that my AF won't stop in time for the test. They will still do the test if I'm spotting but I just hope I don't have another 2 week period. I know I may just have to wait and hope for the best but I am willing to try drinking tons of water, exercising a lot, drinking raspberry tea or lemon juice or anything else along these lines to get my period to shorten.
8.19.2012
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Well I finally saw a fertility specialist last week. My DH and I have now been TTC for 7 months unsuccessfully. I know it doesn't seem like a long time but I have been off the patch for 9 months and I have also been having either a long period or period and spotting for anywhere for 2-3 weeks every month! So with all the bleeding and spotting its been really hard to TTC and I think that has a lot to do with why I'm not getting pregnant.
I asked my GP for chlomid as I did my research and found that this drug may help stabilize my cycles and help me get pregnant. She was not familiar with the drug or my spotting and period issues so she referred me to a fertility specialist.
After 4 months I finally got to see the doctor and review my previous hormone and ultrasound test results. Apparently everything with both tests look fine but the hormone test was done late in my cycle and the ultrasound didn't take a close look at my ovaries. And my DH got a sperm analysis that revealed he had low morphology. So now I need another blood test at the beginning of my cycle to test my hormones again and my tubes flushed so they can see if there are any issues there. And my DH needs to get another sperm analysis to see if the low morphology number was an error or not. The doctor does recommend that I go on chlomid but wants to wait until he gets my test results. He also recommended that I combine chlomid with IUI.
DH is ok with be going on chlomid but doesn't want to jump straight to IUI right away. I would be ok with doing both but I can understand where he is coming from. So I think I will be able to give it 3 months of chlomid before moving onto IUI. IVF did come up during our consultation as an option that we may need to look into later down the road and that kind of freaked me out. I'm sad that we even need any help to get pregnant - we are relatively young and healthy - and I really wanted this journey to happen on its own. And I'm really worried that chlomid and IUI doesn't work. We can't afford IVF and I just don't know how much more of these challenges I can deal with in order to get pregnant. I can barely even talk about TTC any more without getting emotional about the whole situation. I just want to be pregnant already so badly.
So in the meantime I will try and focus on the positive - that we are moving forward and getting closer to having a baby and I'm praying that after my tubes are flushed and on chlomid that I can finally conceive.
8.12.2012
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"Aw I'm so so sorry hun. I'm sorry to hear your having a hard time. Ttc is a very emotional roller coaster. It took us a year to fall Preg with my youngest and we suffered two mc in between. I spent many nights crying and what makes it worse is when people around you are having children with no problems at all and all you really want is to have a baby yourself. I'm glad to hear that your on the road to conceiving. its okay to have a little help. Thinking of you, best wishes." -- CHARLIEAA
Well im about to embark on month 7 of ttc our first baby. Im losing faith every month that goes by that i dont get pregnant. I know it can take up to a year or longer but waiting sucks. Its so hard when everyone around me is pregnant or has a baby. Ugh! Come on body let's get pregnant already!
7.22.2012
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"So sorry :-( I hope you get that bfp very very soon hun !" -- CHARLIEAA
Well I finally stopped spotting this month which is good news. It only took 7 months for my cycles to regulate jeez! I thought I timed BDing as well as I could this month (according to when FF tells me my fertile time is). But I've had some weird symptoms. On Tuesday I had bright yellow stretchy cervical mucus - just like EWCM but bright yellow. It was weird! I read that this could be fertile CM so I BD'd that night. Then the next day I had clear stretchy CM , followed by more bright yellow stretchy CM so I BD'd again. I did take a preg text on Wednesday (7 dpo) which came back negative. Today during a meeting my boobs felt swollen and sensitive and a feeling that my period is coming. Now my boobs are fine. Today is CD 29 and my AF is due in 4-6 days. I'm tired of this waiting game, living my life in two week increments and I'm tired of getting a BFN every month.
7.13.2012
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"Nope I'm not preg. I got AF yesterday so I had a nice glass of wine :)" -- AMANDA_JK
"LOL I'm hoping your preg but if not you should differently treat yourself :-)" -- CHARLIEAA
"Yes, I probably tested to early. I tested again yesterday which may also been too soon. But I have been having period cramps type pains so I think my AF may be starting in a few days. But I will still keep my fingers crossed until AF comes. If AF does come I've decided I'm buying a big bottle of wine and drinking the whole thing LOL. I have been abstaining alcohol since February so I think I deserve a night of drinking (when AF is there)." -- AMANDA_JK
"I'm sorry your feeling tired. When we were ttc our second it felt like everyone around us was falling preg but us. I feel for you as I know how stressful and tired I was. Do you think that you tested a little too early? The earliest I will test is 10dpo. I have many fingers crossed that it was a bit early.remember your not out until af shows. Best of luck hun. Stay positive. " -- CHARLIEAA
Well I think I ovulated on July 4. I bd'd June 23, 25, 27, 29 and July 1, 2. (CD 9, 11, 13, 15, 17, and 18). I had to work out of town from July 3-6 so I may have missed my optimal BD days :(But I will be continuing to bd everyday until my period just in case. I did use pre-seed each time, elevated my hips afterwards and didnt get out of bed for 30 minutes or until the morning. I really hope I have done enough to potentially get a BFP this month but I am doubtful. One weird thing is that I have been experiencing mid-cycle spotting for the past 6 month since being off the patch in December 2011. But I have had no spotting at all this month and I'm around day 21 of my typical 31-32 day cycle. Weird - but I definately don't miss it!!
I will be trying not to obsess over symptoms and waiting until at least CD 27 to test. So the waiting game to July 11 begins.
But like I said, I think I may have missed the window so I am expecting a BFN. But I always hold a bit of hope for a surprise.
7.6.2012
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"My LMP was May 26, and I wasn't tracking my ovulation, but I BD the entire first week of June-1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8--
I started having a hunch something was unusual around June 20th. Took a test June 23...BFP! My doctor calculated I ovulated June 10. So, it is possible! Good luck!" -- GYPSYMOM2013
"Sounds very promising hun! I hope the next few days till test day go super fast for you! Goodluck. Not spotting sounds like a +" -- CHARLIEAA
Well I got down to my goal weight for my beautiful wedding and wedding dress last year. Fast forward a year and I have gained almost 15 pounds - yikes! It may not seem like a lot bit it feels like a lot - especially because I'm only 5'2. My clothes are tight - some I can't even get in to. And I just feel gross! I have been trying to work out but being back in my home City, being busy with work and going out with friends and family has helped me pack on the pounds and not be able to fit in my workouts. I have no one but myself to blame really - and I'm so disappointed in myself that worked so hard to get down to my goal weight and then gained it back in a year. I have also been really depressed by being overweight, the fact that my body is not regular yet and I'm spotting all the time and that I'm not pregnant yet. I am an emotional eater so its been really hard not to turn to overeating to cope with all of these emotions. I have made a goal to lose one pound by the end of the month and then another 2 pounds in July and 2 in August. I think that 5 pounds will make me feel a bit better and closer to my goal/healthy weight. I really hope I can do it!!
6.16.2012
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"Thanks for the support! I know I can do it I just have to DO IT!! I hope being a few pounds lighter will make me feel better about myself and maybe help me get pregnant. Especially with my appointment with the specialist coming up in 2-4 months I dont want them to tell me I need to lose weight - I hate that!!" -- AMANDA_JK
"Keep your head up hun , I hope things turn around for you soon. You can so it!!!" -- CHARLIEAA
So my best friend spotting has come back again for the fifth month in a row. I started charting my BBT this month and thought I timed the BDing pretty well but insteaf of getting a BFP I get a BFN and have been spotting for two days. My AF is due in about 5 days so I'm looking forward to having a week of spotting before I get my period for another week (sarcasm). I'm so beyond dissapointed and frustrated I can barely even type this blog entry. All this spotting eveny month is NOT normal!!! I'm going to call my GP tomorrow to see what the status of my request to see a GYNO is at. I need medical intervention. Its been 7 months since I have been off the patch and my cycles still arent right.
I feel like screaming, crying and I really want to have drinks (but quit a while back just in case I was to get pregnant).
I know I just need to relax, let things happen, keep living life as usual but its so hard to even get through each day.
6.9.2012
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"I'm so sorry :( that's strange spotting before af is due. When I went of the pill to ttc my second it took ages for my cycle to return to normal. We were ttc for a year. We did fall preg twice within this time even though my cycles were irregular but they both ended in a mc. The first normal cycle I had we fell preg with baby Maddy. I truly feel for you. Its just so frustrating espeaily when you don't know what's going on with your body. A visit to your doc wouldn't hurt. I didn't go b..." -- CHARLIEAA
Well I charted my BBT for the first month. I received my ovulation temp spike today (06/2)of 0.3 higher that the previous days so I have ovulated. I 'd on 05/24, 05/27, 05/28, 05/30 and 05/31 and I'm planning to BD today (just in case). So I hope we BD'd close enough to ovulation to get a positive result. I know its only been 4 months of TTC but I really want this to work.
My best friend is due to have her baby in 12 days. I'm so excited for her but this make my TTC journey even harder. I so badly want a baby in my life too.
So let the two week wait to test begin - hoping for a BFP.
6.2.2012
Well, my period was really weird this month. I was spotting all the way up to my period so I'm not sure exactly what date my period actually started as it started to gradually and could be easily confused by spotting.
I started temping but have not noticed a noticable rise or dip in my temperature so I think I am current ovulating and am just about to enter the dreaded two week wait.
I have to say that I really dislike the waiting, confusion and dissapoinments that this whole TTC process has brought so far. I'm an action and results kind of gal and its just not in my nature to relax, go with the flow, let nature take its course and see what happens. I have been trying to just live life, relax and be patient but its so hard. I just hope that I'm not my biggest hurdle to getting pregnant - my inability to relax and be patient I mean.
Even though this is only month 4 of TTC - it feels like an eternity. And every month that I get a BFN is even more depressing than the next.
Come on TWW and BFP.
5.29.2012
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"AF started yesterday :( So I'm out this week. I'm trying to stay positive - like not being pregnant means I have one more month to dave money, lose weight, etc. But its pretty depressing actually.
Due to all my spotting I have made an appointment with a specialist but I have to wait another 2-4 months to see the specialist. Hopefully they can tell me what's going on with my body and if its affecting my chances of getting pregnant. I'm glad my Dr. put the refferal in now rather than waiting f..." -- AMANDA_JK
"You are not alone, I know exactly how you feel. I also have a hard time with just relaxing and not stressing over not getting that BFP. " -- WERBOWCE
"You are not alone, I know exactly how you feel. I find it so hard to relax and not stress over not getting that BFP." -- WERBOWCE
I have really been making an effort to relax, de-stress and not obsess about everything to do with TTC but its been hard.
All I keep thinking about is....why havent I gotten pregnant yet, why do other people who dont even try get pregnant so easily. I should have lost more weight, saved more money, had more done around the house , made more money, eaten better, slept more, etc . I just can't stop from pushing these thoughts out of my mind. ARG!!!
I'm going to try and keep myself busy with reading, working, jobs around the house and going out with friends. I hope this will help me regain my calm and stop obsessing about everything!!!
5.16.2012
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Well I think my AF started on Friday. Its pretty light with mostly dark brown blood so who knows. I have taken several HPTs and all came back BFN.
So even though I'm really frustrated with my body and the TTC process I'm ready to start back at square one this coming month. I bought a basal thermometer and am going to try temping so I can figure out approximately when I'm ovulating as the OPKs are so expensive. I have been taking more time for myself and reading, drinking tea, listening to relaxation music and just trying to keep my stress levels low.
I really hope I get some positive results soon. I have cut out caffiene, take a prenatal vitamin everyday, I'm keeping my stress low and of course BDing alot when I'm not spotting or on AF. I'm trying to lose a few pounds as well but thats been a bit slower than I would like - but I'm going to keep at it.
5.14.2012
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Well, this is the third month of TTC au naturale with no charting or OPKs. I think we BD'd while I was ovulation but I'm not 100%. I spotted for one day during the middle of my cycle so I'm guessing that's when I ovulated. I worked out this morning only to find out afterwards that I had started spotting. Its approximately 9 days after I ovulated - is this more weird cycle symptoms or implantation bleeding?? Who knows...
We had our friends and their 8 month old baby over last night for a game night and I went to my best friends baby shower today. I'm so happy for my friends but I can't help but feeling so emotional and depressed about my own situation and the fact that I want baby so desperately. My husband tries to help me be more patient and put less stress on myself but I just can't help how I feel. With my mom having cancer, me wanting a baby so badly and all our friends having children its just such a hard time for me. I feel like crying all the time. I know I should be looking at the positives in my life rather than focusing on the one negative thing (not having a baby) but its just so hard.....
5.5.2012
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Well I'm 6 dpo and I am bloated, tired, crampy and I had the weirdest metal taste in my mouth this morning. I also had really vivid dreams a few days after ovulation. I had a pap smear today and there was bright red blood in my cervix (which hasn't made it all the way out yet) so is af is coming early or what is going on? My af is due on May 11. I really want to be pregnant too but I keep telling myself that I'm over analyzing things and that I'm probably not pregnant so I'm not disappointed when af comes next week. I really want to wait for a bit to test but I'm going to test on Friday morning with my really sensitive test strips that supposedly tell you if you are pregnant 7-10 dpo. Hoping for good news but I'm kinda thinking I'm not pregnant.
5.2.2012
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"I have been getting 8 hours of sleep each night but I have been waking up totally exhausted the past few days. Its days like this I really wish I could have a caffinated coffee but I gave up caffeine over two months ago arg!" -- AMANDA_JK
Well I have been feeling pretty down in the dumps all weekend. I feel fat, bloated and lazy. This two week waiting period really sucks and is getting me down. I know its too soon to have any symptoms as I just ovulated but I have a feeling in my gut that I'm not pregnant...which is really making me sad. I have always been pretty in tune with my body so I always thought I would know immediately as soon as I became pregnant. its really frustrating that everyone I know got pregnant really fast as soon as they started trying and some of them weren't even sure if they were ready to have a baby. And here I am desperate to have a baby and its not easy or fast. I know we haven't been trying for that long I'm just extremely impatient. When I have my mind set on something its impossible for me to think of anything else, ARG!!!!
4.29.2012
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Well I think I ovulated on April 26 (we are not charting we are just going by the calendar and body signs to make it more relaxed). We BD'd a lot before and the day I ovulated so I hope we have done enough to make the third time the charm. I had a tiny bit of spotting on the day I ovulated but nothing since which is kind of weird as I have been experiencing mid cycle spotting for the last four months since I have been off the patch.
I just found out on Thursday that my mom has cancer (lymphoma) so I am trying to be there for my mom and not get too stressed out and upset until we know the extent of the cancer and not throw off my chances in case I am in fact pregnant. Its been a really challenging week. But the pressure to have a baby (and babies) soon has been intensified with my mom's sickness. Just in case she isn't around for as long I want her to experience being a grandmother and seeing her grandchildren. Its hard to even say these words...it makes her situation so real and I'm a bit numb right now - trying to be strong, not think the worst and totally lose it - until we know what we are dealing with, how advanced the cancer is and what the treatment options are.
4.28.2012
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"Hugs being sent while you work through all this!! More hugs, Jess" -- HC2007
"Well I spoke to soon about the spotting...i started spotting a bit after BD this afternoon. Arg. All this midcycle spotting is getting really annoying! My doctor made a request for me to see a specialist about all my spotting. If I dont get pregnant by the time I see a specialist hopefully they will be able to tell me whats going on. Or maybe its like I have read about and its just a sign of ovulation and fertility...who knows. " -- AMANDA_JK
Well I was at a bridal shower/stagette last night and with the manicure and pedicure I was able to get my cards read by a psychic. Of the many things that she told me (which were eerily accurate of my current life) I was told that I will have a son and then a daughter soon and that they will be healthy. My mom had a still born son before I was born and the psychic told me that my brother would be reincarnated as my own son. Weird! I'm not too sure what to think of all of this but it did make me feel a bit more positive that she saw children in my future so I was happy enough just to hear that.
4.15.2012
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"I think that's kind of cool! Keep us posted on your TTC journey!" -- ABAPTIST
Well I'm getting excited again. My period is winding down and my DH and I will be TTC again in a few days for the third time. I really hope this time is the charm. Its been four months off the patch now. My cycle is still a bit irregular but after blood work and a ultrasound to let me know my hormones are normal and there is nothing structurally wrong with my uterus and ovaries my doc told me I can get pregnant at any time. I know it can take up to 6 months for most couples to get pregnant and up to a year for the majority but I really hope this month is my month.
However, while I wait to get pregnant I have been trying to get all my bad eating habits (chocolate and carbs and overeating in general) in check and get my butt to the gym to try and lose at least 4 pounds to just squeeze back in the normal BMI range. Ideally I would like to lose 10 pounds but that is always been hard for me to get to and maintain.
I wish everyone luck on their TTC journey and if you are reading this post please wish me luck too.
4.14.2012
After all the spotting I finally got my period today. 31 days since the first day of my last period so al least thats on track. Now only if the period and spotting stops long enough to TTC :)
4.10.2012
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Well I got the results from my blood tests ... and it turns out that I don't have a hormone imbalance and that all my hormone levels are fine. So all the irregular periods and spotting is just my body's way of getting back to neutral after coming off the patch in December. Apparently if I keep taking my prenatal vitamin that may help things get back to normal and that I can conceive at any time. But its still pretty frustrating to deal with all the spotting and it makes it pretty hard to TTC when I'm spotting 1-2 weeks and having a period for one of those weeks. I really hope my body gets back to normal soon .... its frustrating.
4.9.2012
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Well with all my spotting and irregular periods I went to the doctor today. I had a urine and blood test and ultrasound to check things out. Nothing besides knowing that I'm not pregnant came out of the urine test and the ultrasound was positive - no structural issues so that's great news. I wont get the results from the blood test for a few days but my doctor thinks I have a hormone imbalance which I also agree with. I hope that whatever the results are that there is a solution (medication, therapy, etc.) to get my body back in baby making condition. I know I received a lot of good news today but I can't help but feel frustrated with my body and that I have to wait another month to TTC. ARG! Being in the ultrasound waiting room with all the pregnant women didn't really help things either. Hopefully it will be my time soon.
4.3.2012
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"Still spotting.....its been six friggen days and my period is due soon. WTF!!! I can't wait to get the results from my doctor next week. I can't take this constant spotting and/or periods." -- AMANDA_JK
Well my DH and I are TTC our first baby this month. I experienced moderate cramps for three days during the time when I was supposed to be ovulating and then yesterday I was experiencing a pulling feeling in my lower abdomen and today I'm experiencing PMS like symptoms. I'm not expecting my period until around April 10 so I'm almost a week away from being able to test. I'm so confused about what's going on my body. I hope they are pregnancy signs but I'm starting to feel like they are something else. I keep telling myself that I don't think I'm pregnant to reduce the disappointment if I'm not.
And then last night my mom went to the emergency and I found out that she has a growth in her stomach area and that she may have lymphoma. She won't have the tests to confirm what it is until next week so I'm trying not to stress out and think the worst but its really hard not to. I'm terrified that she has lymphoma and isn't around to see my children grow up. My grandma (her mom) passed away in her 50's (my mom is in her 50s and I remember all too well how hard that was on my mom, my grandpa and aunts and uncles....let alone myself and the other grandchildren.
And on top of all these worries and fears about my mom I'm terrified that all this stress is going to make it hard to TTC or cause a miscarriage.
Why can't life be easier?
4.1.2012
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"Thanks I appreciate the support! I'm trying not to stress too much about my mom ... at least not until we know anything for sure. But I'm really frusrtated with my body right now. I have been spotting again for two days (spotted for a few days last week as well) and its still at least 5 days until my period. So I'm going to see my doctor tomorrow to see if there is something wrong or if there is anything she can do to get my cycle and hormones back on track. Arg!" -- AMANDA_JK
"Hugs! they say you're only given what you can handle but sometimes even this doesnt seem like truth! Prayers and hugs to you and your family!! ~Jess" -- HC2007
Well my cycle is all over the place and I'm not to sure how long my cycle is supposed to be as its lasted for differnt amount of times since I have been off the patch (December). I think I'm supposed to be ovulating but I just started spotting today. I have had spotting between periods before so I'm not sure if its just normal mid-cycle spotting or if it could be implantation bleeding. I really hope its implantation bleeding but I don't want to get my hopes up either. Since I feel like I have waited so long to get pregnant I feel like I'm putting a lot of pressure on myself to get pregnant right away. I know I should be more relaxed and just see where the TTC process takes us and not get too worried until its been a long time but I'm so impatient and want to be pregnant so badly. I dont even know how I can wait until when I should be expecting my next period to see if I'm pregnant or not.
3.25.2012
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Its a few days before I ovulate and I am so excited about the prospect of possibly becoming pregnant within the next few weeks. Its beein such a long time coming that its so surreal and exciting. Its so hard to focus on work and things in my every day life with the excitement of TTC.
3.20.2012
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Well things are finally looking up for my husband and I. After almost 7 months of job hunting he has finally got a great job in his field. Its so surreal since its been so long and we have been getting so negative, frustrated and annoyed about the whole process. We can finally start TTC next week. I'm so happy and I can't believe this time has finally come.
3.12.2012
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Well I thought my husband was ready to start trying to have a baby this week. I was hoping he was truly serious when he said we should maybe start trying to have a baby. But like the as usual for the last few months he says something to lead me to believe he may be ready, I get excited, then he changes his mind (or says he was just thinking out Loud) and then I get depressed and sad all over again. Its such a sad and depressing time in my life. Every day is a struggle to not just crawl into a ball in bed and cry all day. I have been ready for so long to start this next chapter of my life so I can't wait to start trying. We tried last month and were unsuccessful but my husband also didn't get the job that he thought he was going to get either so he wanted to stop trying because it was causing him too much stress and didn't want to have me be pregnant while he didn't have a job. I don't think my body was ready to conceive since my cycle was abnormal due to coming off the pill.
So here we are again. My husband still doesn't have a job (after 5 months), I'm stressed about being the only one working and supporting us and I'm also depressed that I also don't get to have what I want most in life - a baby.
I'm so impatient and I don't know how much longer I can wait. I love my husband and I'm trying to be understanding and supportive but I always feel like I'm the one making all the sacrifices. I know that probably sounds so selfish. I mean, I know my husband is going through a rough time too not being able to find a job too. And I'm trying to be the best wife and support I can be but I'm really hurting inside.
I,m also so petrified that that I have waited so long to get pregnant and that when I try now that I will not be able to get pregnant or it will take a really long time. I don't know if I have it in me to go through a challenging time in order to get pregnant with all of the challenges we have already faced in our relationship and marriage. Financially, its not the best time for us to have a baby but when will it be? We are married, we bought a house and live in the same city as our family now. And I think we will just make it work once we have a baby. But until my husband is on board - there will be no baby because I don't want to coerce him into anything he isn't ready to do either. This is the most challenging time I have ever experienced with my husband and some days its really hard to just go on living life and hold in all the tears.
2.12.2012
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Well its been a little over a week since my DH and I agreed to postpone TTC and its been excruciatingly emotionally painful. All I have ever wanted was to be married and have children. Not TTC is so hard and depressing to go through every day. I love my husband and I know that postponing having children is the right thing to do from a financial sense but I just can't let the thought of waiting go. I don't know how much waiting I can take. I'm trying to do the right thing by not telling my husband how hard this is on me but I just can't seem to keep all these emotions and thoughts inside. My yearnings to have a child is so strong I can barely think of anything else in life. The fact that my best friend is 4.5 months pregnant really isn't helping things either. She is so excited. I am so happy for her but I'm also jealous that she is so happy and gets to go through the joy of having a baby. I would never let her know how much her happiness hurts me because that's selfish of my and not the right thing to do. So I always ask her how her pregnancy is going, visit her, talk about the baby and her plans with for the future being a mom because I want to be a good friend like I'm sure she will be for me when my time finally comes. But doing this for her is so excruciatingly painful. I'm even crying right now writing about how painful this is to me. I know my time will come but its so hard right now. I really hope things get better for us so we can TTC. I don't know how much longer I can wait feeling this way.
1.29.2012
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"Thanks so much for the kind words, support and tips.
Its a really complicated situation. My husband just finished 8 years of school and has been unemployed and looking for a job since September. We bought a new hours (was living in a house his parent owned before then) and I have been supporting both of us since October. I can barely afford all our bills and expenses on my own so we have been dipping in to our savings a bit every month. My husband is extremely angry/frustration/depressed abo..." -- AMANDA_JK
"I know it's so hard to figure out things, especially when our heart is yearning for something. It sounds like this is a conclusion that you and your husband has come to together; so I would encourage you to talk to your husband about these emotions that you're feeling. He needs to be your greatest support an advocate in this and he may not realize how hard it is on a woman with this sort of decision. Maybe you and him can sit down and talk it out and come up with a goal date, something like "..." -- MOMMYELKES
Well my husband and I have officially posponed baby making. I'm a little sad but its the best financial choice. After 5 months of job hunting with no job we have decided to postpone TTC until my husband is working rather than getting pregnant and just hoping he will find something before we have a baby.
1.20.2012
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Well my husband didn't get one of the jobs he interviewed for and is totally depressed and now thinks that he won't get the other job either. Needless to say that this has totally halted our TTC journey and I am trying to be as positive and supportive as possible but its really hard. I just don't know what to do and feel that any positive and supportive thing I do say is just not the right thing to say. I love my husband. He is great at the type of work he does and has just had really bad luck finding a job. I really hope he gets the other job that he is waiting to hear back about so that he can start feeling better and we can be really happy again. This job hunting process has taken a major toll on our relationship. We are both stressed out about money all the time. I know we can get through this but it would be nice to see some sort of light at the end of the tunnel. I pray for good things for my husband, for us and our future together.
If anyone reads this blog please pray for us too! Thanks so much!
1.18.2012
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"You are certainly in my prayers! We are in the same boat. My husband has been out of work for a year. We started our own business which has brought in some income but he is still looking for a "normal and steady" job. Fingers crossed. He has an interview Friday. He too has been really depressed which has certainly put a damper on any baby making! Men feel they need to be providing, it's their instinct. Keep trying to be supportive and smile and keep your mouth shut when he's in a bad moo..." -- ABAPTIST
Well the time has finally come for me and my husband to start TTC our first baby. It took my husband a while to get to the place where he is ready (even though I dont think most men are ever ready). I'm so excited that the time has finally come. So many of my friends and co workers have had a baby last year or are pregnant so I hope it doesnt take too long to get pregnant. It took my body almost a month to get somewhat back to normal after being on birth control (pill then the patch) for 14 years. But we are going to just try adn see what happens. Hopefully I will have a baby this in 2012. I can't wait!!!
1.15.2012
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