I have to vent

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MYANDULKA
Posts: 1720
12/1/08 9:39 A

Oh my... that is a difficult situation. It does seem that your DH is being irrational.... so maybe just give him some time... but be sure to always keep the dialogue alive...
I think that you are wise to suggest that you won't go for baby #3 if hubby still isn't on board -- because that is just going to add stress on your relationship -- you both need to be in agreement to have that third baby.... but if you truly want another baby... just make sure to always find appropriate times to discuss... because as of right now.. his excuses seem a little thin -- like he doesnt want you to get fat -- what's all that about???!!!!!!!
And sure it is sweet that he doesn't want to see you in pain -- but you've been there before (x2) and you know what to expect....
For now my advice would be to give yourself a deadline (6 mos... or a year, 2 years?? not sure how long you want to wait??).. but don't tell DH your deadline... and see how he feels down the road. Good luck!!

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MY2GIRLIES
Posts: 1733
12/1/08 8:59 A

It doesn't sound like he is completely against another kid, otherwise he'd be pushing more to get the Vasectomy done. Maybe he just feels right now is not the time for another baby.
Maybe he has unresolved issues or fears from the first pregnancy/birth.
But yeah, the cutting himself is not rational.

- Christina

MY_PUNKYROO
Posts: 492
11/26/08 9:55 P

I know it's been a long while posting on here, but I just had to vent some steam.

So DH and I talked about having 3max kids when we got married and after DD was born I said only 2. Well I really want to have another baby and preferably before DD is 5 and DH doesn't want another baby :-( But he says he wants to get a Vsect done but wont utnil we are 100% for sure done since he knows I know I'm not done.

I know I don't want to have another one if he doesn't, obviously reasons. But tongiht he's saying that he wouldn't want me to give birth again in fear that "I might get fat (he'd still love me though)" and "since I want a homebirth he doesn't want to see me in pain" and when I tell him that is my descision to deal with the pain he compares it to how would I feel if he cut himself!! OMG, are you serious!! I was/am so furious. He is terrible at doing comparisons but still that's bad even for him. He is a sweet and supporting hubby but this is just twisting me the wrong way.

ANywho thanks for letting me rant.

Be the change you want in the world-Ghandi

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