I think we saw my son walk and possibly crawl for the first time. At home we worked with him on it, so we ended up reaping the benefits. With my daughter, we were all at their house, when she walked (took her most steps) for the first time. And it was special - as it was after my MIL had been diagnosed with cancer and had the tumor removed - so we were glad that she got to witness that first.
Walking and crawling comes in small steps. you see small progression over time, it doesn't just happen over night. I think everyone gets to see a little bit of it.
---M2C---
Posts: 4997
6/19/12 11:53 A
My MIL was similar when I first had my son. See the other post about grandmas - for a little more background.
But she would do things like heat the bottle in boiling water - killing the breastmilk antibodies I worked so hard to pump! and I had a limited supply. I can't recall everything that erked my nerves in the beginning, but I did have to put my foot down on some things. I had typed up a schedule and summary of what Caden was going through. How often he should be fed, how much, when he was going through a growth spurt - how to gradually increase his bottles and keep his feedings spaced out. I also had a sheet for her to feel out for how much he ate when, when he pooped, how long he napped. i didn't do this with my daughter.
JUICE!! Yikes! My daughter is 21mo and only recently has gotten juice for the first time as a treat. Prior to that, before 1 is was limited to slipping in juice with her bottles if she was constipated - that was a rare feast. Then after 1 it was when she was sick and I wanted to push fluids. Juice is not healthy. I would put my foot down on that one.
Baby's firsts - you will miss out on some of those - but you will get to see them too. Babies this age aren't much into the zoo - it gets more exciting taking them places when they are little older to appreciate things, because that will be the first time they really get to experience it. I kindof feel like - let them take baby to zoo now - Grandma wants to get out of the house - its for her, babies just going for a walk in the stroller. But when baby can start pointing or laughing and walking - oh, that is where all of the excitement starts. You will get to see alot of that - there is lots to go around!
Just think of how nice it will be having grandma so close to your kids. and how fortunate you are to have free or inexpensive childcare, and to know that your child is with someone who loves them as much as you do, and will care for your child as much as you do. And your child will grow to know they have another caring/positive adult they can go to if they ever have a problem with anything. I think that is priceless. I feel so lucky that I have that as an option when so many people don't.
JACOBSMOM09
Posts: 2641
6/18/12 7:11 A
One thing that is going to happen for sure if you aren't home with your child full time is that someone else, whether it is your mother or another caregiver, will be there for some of your child's firsts. That cannot be avoided. And, we all do what we need to do, so don't feel bad about it. My sitter saw Jacob roll over for the first time, etc. That being said, you do need to lay some ground rules with your mom. Traditional caregivers are not going to do the things like take your baby to the zoo for the first time, feed them something you don't want them to, etc. So, you need to get an understanding of what things you don't want her doing. She may not like it, and you have to be prepared for that. But, if you don't have other options for childcare, there may not be any choice for you. Hopefully, she will agree I would suggest giving her a feeding schedule - what, how much, how often, a sleep schedule, what you want her watching on TV if that's important to you, etc.
formerly lisanoll
Lisa
mommy to
Jacob Tyler - Born July 13, 2009
Rachel Katherine -
Born November 4, 2012
SERITAV
Posts: 19
6/17/12 9:58 P
My baby just turned three months about 5 days ago and my mother has been a big help babysitting during my work week and helping out if I needed to go places or meeting appointments. But lately its becoming increasingly apparent that my mom thinks her grandbaby is actually HER baby. It started with my mom giving her 8 oz bottles before I wanted her to, but now its getting worse, for more important things. For instance I stopped by my parents' house after church today and my mom casually mentioned she was going to start giving my daughter baby juice this week.... Without even asking my opinion or anything! Anyway she must have had a feeling I was uneasy because she asked if I wanted to try and give her some today. I gave her a couple ounces because I just didn't want to get into it. Another example is earlier in the week she mentioned taking our daughter to the zoo. I said that me and my husband were planning on taking her when I went on vacation next week and she gave a very cavalier response. I want to be there for MY daughter's firsts. I mean is she going to give her her first food when I'm not around, have her crawl and tell everyone before I get to see it??? Walking??? I don't know what to do. How do I approach this?
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