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Can't start preschool if not potty trained

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HC2007
Posts: 3707
1/6/11 10:34 P

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I know children who are three and four who aren't reliable potty users. Each kid is so unique that this can be really tough. I feel like their must be an alternative but I dont know what.

We found it easiest for our little guy to potty train along with his daycare group. They started a pattern for asking right around age 2 and half. We followed along and suddenly LO had it mastered. I think it made it easier that all of his buddies where doing it at the same time. Do you have any buddies the same age?


~Jess

A boy is Truth with dirt on its face, Beauty with a cut on its finger, Wisdom with bubble gum in its hair and the Hope of the future with a frog in its pocket.
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CHRISTA1017
Posts: 105
1/6/11 5:41 P

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Thanks I feel that my child is just not there it took me over a year to train Michael sometimes he was fine then he took a few steps back but its expected sometimes. Kids go at there own pace. I the biggest supporter of my kids. I wouldn't force them, I'll go @ their pace.


Just take it one day at a time.
CATHY_T
Posts: 10345
1/6/11 1:57 P

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Just wanted to add - I started training my son about 3 months before he turned 3, in anticipation of him starting preschool. He is now 4 and a half and STILL not reliably clean and dry. There is some family history of others with weak bladders/late potty training/bedwetting even up to teens (on DH's side of course!) The preschool worked with me and I tried EVERYTHING over the last 18+ months to get him trained. We've also had him evaluated medically in case there was a physical problem - there isn't. Sometimes, the child is just not able to do it, for no obvious reason. It's not fair to exclude them from education because of it.

CHRISTA1017
Posts: 105
1/6/11 1:36 P

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Thank you all for comments I appreciate it. After considering I am looking into a different school I have to my little guy is some what interested in the potty that "good" for me I think @ 2 1/2 , I'll leave him without underwear and then really focus on potty training. I can't force him! Also I think pull ups are also a waste it confuses the child.

Also I found out that Aidan teacher came back from vacation and told me that that teacher doesn't like the 1 yr old when she has to give them milk, " The milk makes there poop smelly" she has a problem with kids.


Just take it one day at a time.
LYDIALAND
Posts: 5161
1/6/11 11:10 A

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This policy is not uncommon where I live. Lots of the home based daycares won't require potty training but the school bases centers will at a 2-3 years old. I had to postpone my daughter from starting at her private school until after the summer she turned 2 just to make sure she was fully trained.

I just had her in underwear or naked at home all summer and she was 100% day and night trained in time for fall enrollment!

SSUND911
Posts: 5285
1/6/11 10:43 A

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My son is in a private school and he started the first class for kids 18-28 months and they did not have to be trained it just had to be a starting process. but now he is in PRESCHOOL age 3 and he HAS To be trained. This took us all summer to accomplish but he is there.

We took off the diapers and kept him in underwear, he picked out the charcters he wanted and it is tough but you have to remind him to go every 5-10 minutes. some use candy to bribe their kids or as a reward. We used Stickers for his reward and we had a paper in the bathroom on the wall and he got to put his stickers on the paper. just stay persistant with your DS. Good luck!!!

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CATHY_T
Posts: 10345
1/6/11 10:27 A

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Oops double post

Edited by: CATHY_T at: 1/6/2011 (10:27)

CATHY_T
Posts: 10345
1/6/11 10:19 A

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I think it's crazy for them to demand a child be potty trained at 2. My son's preschool he started at 3, and they "liked" them to be potty trained, but they accept that even at 3, some children just aren't quite ready and a few started in pullups. They were also pretty tolerant of accidents during the first few weeks when everything was new and exciting and many kids are too busy to remember to go to the bathroom in time.

You CAN'T force it. Trying is the worst thing you can do. You might cause toilet-fear issues or make it a battle and actually delay the time when your son will train. It really is best just to follow his lead. And if the preschool doesn't know that - is it really so great?

ANGE_AHMED
Posts: 1600
1/6/11 9:47 A

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In my entire long post I should have said that- if a child isn't ready there's nothing you can do to force it. If they're keeping their diapers or pull ups dry for a few hours then their bodies are getting ready for something- their bladders are learning how to "contract and release". Like Jake_Admasmommy said 2/5 days were dry. That's GREAT! If you see no improvement after a week or so then it probably means it's not the right time. I do find it young to demand that the child be ready...

JAKE_ADAMSMOMMY
Posts: 6931
1/6/11 9:36 A

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2 seems really early to have to be potty trained - however, if that is the preschool policy, they can't exactly bend the rules for one parent and not others. Around here, all the preschools I looked into required pullups for the 2.5-3 year old classes and potty trained for 36 months and older. In Adam's daycare, they have to be potty trained to get into one of the 3 year old classes but one 3-3.5 year old classroom still allows kids in the progress of potty training (they do the same thing for naps - one 3 year year old room has naps and one doesn't) - for their 3 year old preschool class (their youngest one) kids have to be potty trained or they're not allowed in.

If a child is ready, putting them in underwear and dealing with a lot of accidents for a few days can be very successful. I did it with Adam in July (right after he turned 3) and did it last week with Jake, and it's going well for him as well (3 accident filled days then 2 dry days - yeah!)

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ANGE_AHMED
Posts: 1600
1/5/11 11:53 P

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As an educator who loves my job and takes it very seriously- your child's teacher is NOT being professional and it would make me uncomfortable to leave my child with her. I've never worked in Montessori, I know there are a few different types and some are more strict than others but it's just... Not for me. Mind you I know parents who loved having their children there. Most other daycares will take your child potty trained or not at that age... It's hard for some kids especially, as you said, when there's a change or new addition.
As for tips- most places I work have BANNED pull ups and I agree. It confuses the child... I can pee my pants sometimes? We leave the child in underware and pants and ask the parents for four changes of clothes a day. We put them on toilet, we don't use pottys but I have in the past and they worked fine, when they arrive, and pretty much every 15 mins. We leave them sit for their age (18 mths=1.5 mins...3yrs = 3 mins)... Of course after every snack, meal or drink... And of course when they go- HUGE round of applause. Make it a fun time and NEVER GET MAD AT ACCIDENTS.
I know ppl will disagree with this but: I've had MANY children fully trained by 2 years old (minus naps- most kids just aren't ready). We just spent a whole lot of time in the bathroom. I convinced my sis to try with her daughter and by her 2nd bday she was sleeping through the night without diapers.
Boys are harder but the same things work.
Last thing: BE CONSISTANT. That's the problem with pull ups. They're confusing (again- if I pee my pants I don't get wet).
If you let him wear a diaper or anything (I know it's easier!) it'll just take longer.

Just realizing how long my post is- I apologize and I hope it helps. Didn't mean to turn all "educator" on you! Lol. It's just the response I give most parents unless I think their child isn't ready

Edited by: ANGE_AHMED at: 1/6/2011 (00:02)

SNOOZEFEST
Posts: 5367
1/5/11 10:18 P

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I'm pretty sure they don't have to be potty trained for the toddler program. It's the primary class (ages 2.5 - 6.5) where they have to be potty trained. Call the school again and double-check.

CHRISTA1017
Posts: 105
1/5/11 7:09 P

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I really don't know I tour the preschool, like the people good environment but they they said he has to be two yrs old and potty trained so I wanted to transfer both kids, but unsure now. I looking to change daycare for my kids though. My oldest teacher is kinda getting to me.

She complained that my 3 yr old rolled his eyes @ her, I told her he was bored cause I've been kinda homeschooling him. He likes to learn, she asked "Do I force him to learn" & "Does he have a normal childhood." I think she doesn't like my kid anymore & I want to change schools.


Just take it one day at a time.
WHISTLERMOMMY
Posts: 760
1/5/11 6:44 P

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is it a Casa program they are putting him in? Because toddler programs start at 18 mos-2.5 years where I live, and theres no way that they could expect an 18 month old to be potty trained. Are they putting him into a Casa program early?

CHRISTA1017
Posts: 105
1/5/11 6:05 P

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I found a preschool for my son that I loved but, I have one problem they say they can't except him yet if not potty trained. Aidan tells me after he goes. My oldest son wasn't fully potty trained after three yrs old. He reverted after I had Aidan. @ 2 1/2 Michael refused to go. The montessori preschool says he can't start unless potty trained. Unsure what to do?

Does anyon have any fast potty training tips?


Just take it one day at a time.

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